Bitterness is worse than venom! Bitterness, this lasting feeling of sadness mixed with resentment, is linked to humiliation, disappointment, and the injustice of fate. Who has never been frustrated? Who has never been disappointed? Who has never been humiliated? Who has never been the victim of an injustice? In short, who has never been sad in his life until bitterness appeared in him? So, what is the key to overcoming anger and bitterness?
– “I remain bitter towards my brothers and sisters for the way they treated me. ”
– “After several years, I am still full of bitterness when I think of my divorce. ”
– “I have bitterness in the face of life. It has always been hard for me. ”
These are the words of a person with bitterness.
Our relationships with each other are more or less close and often even conflicting or hurtful to the point that we may find ourselves not digesting what happened. This is how sadness takes root in us.
What Are Anger and Bitterness?
Bitterness is a mixture of anger, revolt, and sadness over suffering that we have experienced as unjust. We keep a bitter taste in these experiences because it seems to us that those responsible for the situation (in general, we blame others other than ourselves) could have avoided imposing these sufferings on us. We also keep a bitter taste because we remain trapped in these feelings, which become “poisonous” in the long run. There is always bitterness in bitterness (but bitterness does not always contain bitterness). A grudge is lingering anger. It persists because it has not had a successful outcome. The same goes for the bitterness that remains if we do not take the necessary actions to go after this experience and complete the circle.
In fact, bitterness is, first and foremost, a sign of pain that is still alive. It also indicates that we have not fully expressed our emotions or that we have not acted in order to respect ourselves completely with the people who have caused us the harm that still affects us.
Called to Overcome Anger and Bitterness
Despite everything, we are always called to maintain peace and transparency with our fellow men. We must drive away all bitterness from our feelings and from our memory because a root of bitterness stored within us is likely to bud, then invade our feelings and ultimately cause damage, not only to us but also bet our loved ones.
This root of bitterness, this resentment, arises when we do not forgive an offense or what we believe, rightly or wrongly, to be an offense.
The Problem With Bitterness.
First, it’s because he has destructive feelings in us: resentment, bitterness, revenge, contempt, and hatred. Just because we didn’t forgive. Forgiveness is the key to freedom. Forgiveness frees and regenerates. Besides, if we do not forgive, it is already disobedience to God since the Bible commands us to do it as God in Christ forgave us (Ephesians 4:32; Colossians 3:13).
Then it’s that bitterness spreads like an infection. It can manifest itself in hurtful, mocking, or even defamatory language. It distorts the vision we have of our neighbor and gives birth to impulses of violence or intolerance. It overwhelms our reason and can lead us to uncontrolled acts. It is particularly devastating in a marriage where it compromises trust, affection, and love between spouses.
Finally, bitterness gives Satan access: get angry, but do not sin: let the sun not set on your irritation; and do not give the opportunity to the devil ”(Ephesians 4: 26-27); “Whosoever you forgive, I also forgive him … so that Satan has no hold over us, because we do not ignore his intentions” (2 Corinthians 2: 10-11).
The Key to Overcoming Anger and Bitterness
1. Step Back and Identify the Cause of the
Anger and Bitterness
Ask yourself: Why? What is causing this bitterness?
Very often, it is a feeling of injustice or injury inflicted by someone … The first thing to do is really to step back and identify the cause of this bitterness, this resentment, in order to be able to find suitable solutions.
2. Think About the Consequences of Anger and Bitterness
What are the consequences of your life? Try to think honestly about the consequences of this bitterness. You will be surprised to find that you are the first victim. And no doubt you are depriving yourself of blessings by harboring bitterness.
3. Imagine the Blessings of God Behind Your Wounds
If God is for me, who will be against me? Trust him; he traces a path. Be convinced; he knows what you need. All things will end up contributing to your good. Abide in faith.
4. Decide Not To Wear This Injury
You were injured … Victim. And then maybe you suffered denial or injustice. Put it all at the feet of Jesus, and forgive … You will free yourself from the burden of bitterness.
5. Do Not Seek Justice!
His justice is better than the justice of men. Trust the Lord to exercise it. It is better to let it act rather than try to do justice for yourself. His love in you exceeds the hatred of those who have hurt you. So drop it!
In Summary
Bitterness is unfortunately devastating in our lives. It is a breeding ground for many negative feelings and harmful behaviors. It is important to detect it quickly and to fight it, not only to counter the damage it causes in the lives of others but to avoid serious consequences in our own lives.
Thus, to prevent any root of bitterness from entering our thoughts, let us forgive with all our hearts and as many times as necessary (Matthew 18: 21-22); let us maintain frank relations with all; do not suspect our neighbor of having bad thoughts about us.